Wahoo's Trip Report Negril 2009

[ECO]

Wahoo, I was 80 miles away and I can clearly state that the sunbeams were pointing at me. I'm not calling you a liar, rather pointing out that the salt air confused you or maybe there was some smoke in the air around you.

[Wahoo]

I was trying to snap a pic of the magnificent world-class perky tatas of the topless babe in the hammock, but that Brit dude's big head was in the way!

[ECO]

What's up with the guy under the tree, some sort of security guard or police? Is that a tourist beater in his left hand?

[Wahoo]

What's up with the guy under the tree, some sort of security guard or police? Is that a tourist beater in his left hand?

Respeck! Actually, I think that security person was a she, not a he...to the best my recollection...which, admittedly, isn't too reliable, considering my extreme altered state of consciousness at the time.

[Wahoo]

Maybe it's just my paranoia, but I think she was taking notes on me (observe in that pic how she's staring straight at me, the photographer). And it rattled me that the massage gyals at the hotel knew my room number! I didn't tell them my room number...I think somebody was keeping tabs on me. Spooky!

[ECO]

So the stick in her left hand was there to beat you if you got out of control with the massage girls?

[Wahoo]

Dayummm, I didn't even notice that club in her hand! My mind must've really been out in the bejezzus belt that day! Actually, I remembered the massage gyals, and they remembered me, from my previous visit 2 years earlier. Even though I didn't avail myself of their services on the earlier trip, we had some really easy rapport going on this trip--they was the ones who coached me about the proper way to drink a Bob Marley (bottoms up!) and cheered me on. I really liked those gyals. Maybe I'll invite them to party with me after their shift next time.

[Wahoo]

I see that the hotel now has a hot tub, between the bar and Alfreds. I'll most definitely be sure to check out that hot tub if I ever stay there again. And the best thing is I can soak in the hot tub and gaze at the stars and listen to the reggae musick blasting from Alfreds three nights a week without having to run the gauntlet of prostitutes at the bar at Alfreds to get a beer!