What would you do if you were a cartoon?

[Nanoose]

If I was a cartoon I would go to a town meeting were Homer Simpson lives and let them know that over in Cohog they allow petafiles to serenade 15 year old boys in the middle of the night with a wind up Gramophones - then we would go over and have a “talk” with them. I think when we get there and I see Joe I will say – he’s mine because he was a cop and he allowed a petafiile with a child size net to hang around a play ground and sing – every thing goes better with a bag a dope (got a little personal there because it was like they were saying even child molesting goes better with a bag of dope.
The only thing that would stop me would be is if Chief Wiggon said no he’s mine - he was a good dad and once he even bonded with Bart for the sake of his boy.

Cheers and happy week end!

[Nanoose]

(continued from above)

On the way back to Homers house I would go over to Principle Skinner and reach into my Dukes of Hazard lunch kit and pull out an elephant sized trophy that says – Worlds Greatest Principle. When he says – I can’t except that – I will remind him of the time that not only did he save Ralf Wiggoms life he also gave the youth of Springfield a valuable lesson. (a cargo container full of furniture that was hanging from a crain was about to dump onto Ralf - Skinner jumped on top of it and started running around in circles – when Nelson sad – ha ha Skinner is spassing out – Skinner calmly said – I’m not spassing out I am creating a centrifugal force – when Bart said wow why didn’t somebody tell us about centrifugal force – Skinner snapped back - I did you just didn’t pay attention.
Then I would go bar hopping with Principle Skinner and around last call I would say to Skinner – Mr. do you want to meet my sister – then I would reach into my Dukes of Hazard lunch kit and pull out my cartoon sister. Cheers!